


Measure Up

by h_itoshi



Category: Hey! Say! JUMP
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-14
Updated: 2015-10-14
Packaged: 2018-04-26 10:04:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5000590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/h_itoshi/pseuds/h_itoshi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes, Yamada really does wish they could be kids again, so they wouldn't have to work 25 hours or care about things like gaining weight.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Measure Up

Yamada scrambles in after a photoshoot that went on a bit too long due to some lighting issues, out of breath and outerwear not quite in place.

"Yamada-san!" One of the costume girls calls as soon as she sees him, sounding relieved and a little exasperated.

"Sorry I'm late." He excuses himself and quickly throws his bag and jacket over the armrest of the couch. The explanation about photoshoot is on the tip of his tongue, but he stops himself since he knows they don't care anyway. The tour is starting soon and they're scheduled for final costume fittings tonight, even though he was pretty sure he wouldn't be able to make it from the start. His schedule is so packed he can't even remember which magazine he's shooting for these days, and late photoshoots tend to take longer than planned since everyone is tired.

The costume girl gives him a look that clearly says fine for now, and then hands him his first costume.

He doesn't bother leaving to change since these ladies know more about his body than most of his exes already, and instead hurries to get into it, so much that he scratches himself on a zipper and curses.

"Hey Yama-chan." There's a familiar voice saying before the costume girl can even open her mouth. "Take a breath before you tear your costumes apart."

Yamada looks up while pulling the jacket on, facing Hikaru's smiling face and suddenly he wants to cry. It feels like when he's so wound up he doesn't even know what he's doing and his mother hugs him, a familiarity of someone who cares about him and not just about what he's supposed to be doing next.

"Hey." Is all he manages in reply, but he does take a deep breath and tries to relax as the costume girl makes him spin and she assesses the seams with skeptical eyes.

"Hey." Hikaru replies, in his final costume and arm stretched out while there's another costume girl hand sewing something at his armpit. "Stressed today?"

"I haven't slept in like 25 hours." Yamada admits, and he knows that's why he's so wound up he can't really keep his idol face on anymore. And the reason he gets so much tunnel vision that he didn't even think to look around the room to see who were there even though he hasn't seen much of his group lately.

Now that he does, besides Hikaru, Takaki's on the other end of the couch where he threw his stuff, engaged in his phone but seemingly done with his fitting, and the others must have already left.

"Hang in there bro." Hikaru says, trying to reach him with his free arm, but there's a few decimeters left and Hikaru pats the air pointedly instead. "You get to sleep after this. You look pretty bad you know, when's your next free night, we should go out and eat."

Yamada smiles as he's commanded into his next outfit, because even though the words might have sounded offending from someone else, from Hikaru they're only caring. "Maybe next month or something."

"No way." Hikaru refuses, shaking his head. "Just let me know when you finish before midnight the next time and I'll bring some of the boys and awesome food."

Yamada doesn't say anything about that that would still have to be at least next week, instead only smiles as Hikaru's told he's finished and free to go. "Thanks."

"No problem." Hikaru grins as he steps out of his costume and into his own clothes, patting Yamada's shoulder for real when he passes him. "Take care."

"I'll try." Yamada sighs, before changing into his third costume.

He's not really present while spinning and turning and testing dance moves in his costumes, busy thinking about his schedule tomorrow and when he needs to get up while trying not to look at the watch and see his sleeping hours tick by.

"Takaki-san, it's finished, please come and try it again." The third costume girl says suddenly, and Yamada understands why Takaki was still there as she holds out the green sparkly jacket.

He hears Takaki rise, then feels a hand on his shoulder when Takaki passes him, but there's no greeting besides that.

Yamada only has two costumes left, but when he zips up his pants the costume girl frowns, stepping forward to stick two fingers inside his waistband. Yamada's not even fazed, having lost his sense of personal space long ago, but he sees on her expression what she's going to say and he's not sure he can hear that right now.

"These are a bit tight." She says, and Yamada's heart falls. "Have you been gaining?"

"I hope not." He answers truthfully, but he has to admit he's been so busy remembering to eat at all lately that he hasn't given much thought to what he's been eating.

"I think you have." She says, deep in thought as she reaches for a measuring tape and looks at his thighs like they're a serious problem. Yamada breathes a sigh through his nose, trying to keep himself from bursting out into tears right here because this is the last drop that he didn't need today.

At least these are the only pants of the show that doesn't have the shape of sweatpants so they won't have to re-sew too much, he thinks bitterly.

"Does it really matter?" Takaki's voice breaks in, and he sounds so irritated Yamada turns to look at him even though he knows his eyes are a little glossy. "Like there's one person in the audience that doesn't want him in tight pants anyway."

"Well, management-" The costume girl opens her mouth to protest, but Takaki doesn't let her go on, his eyes glowing with anger.

"They're one pair of pants and it's not like they're too small, just tight. Just leave it for once." He says, and Yamada's so surprised that Takaki talks back to them that he's left gaping since Takaki normally doesn't bother saying his opinion.

"I..." The costume girl looks at her colleagues, who both look as lost as she does, and finally she sighs. "Fine. Let's take the next costume."

Yamada just nods, relief and gratefulness flooding him at the thought that this won't get into any written measurements, and he promises himself to stop comfort eating stuff with cream in them.

Takaki's jacket seems to be fine, whatever was wrong with it, and so he picks up his stuff and leaves before Yamada can even say goodbye.

His costume girl finally tells him he's finished, but gives him a stern look as he slips back into his jeans. "Just don't gain any more, okay?"

"I won't." Yamada promises, and even though it feels a bit humiliating he knows it's a part of his job description.

He wraps his fluffy scarf around his neck so that he can cry into it later if he wants to, but he's barely out the door before someone wraps a hand around his arm.

"Come on." Takaki tells him, and he's so taken aback he simply follows, figuring that since it's Takaki it can't be too bad.

He's led through a couple of doors and then up some stairs, and Yamada's starting to suspect where they're heading even though it doesn't make any sense. "Takaki? Where are we going?"

"Just come on." Takaki tells him, a hand still around Yamada's wrist as he leads him up a spiral staircase to a fire door, and suddenly they're on the roof.

"The roof?" Yamada asks, wrapping his jacket tighter around himself at the cold winds this high up. "Are we even allowed to be here?"

Takaki shrugs, his brown hair getting tousled by the wind as he tugs on Yamada's wrist that he still hasn't let go of.

"I'm not going to jump with you." Yamada says as Takaki guides him closer to the edge, but he can't help smiling. "I'm not that desperate even though I'm fat again."

Takaki stops at that, turning around as he lets go of Yamada's wrist, expression serious. "You remember that we used to go onto the roof when we were younger? Looking at cities when we were so tired we could only laugh or cry at everything anyway?"

Yamada blinks, but then looks out over the blinking lights of Tokyo at night. "Yeah, I think Yabu and Daiki did that Titanic thing."

Takaki smiles softly, but the smile quickly fades again and he breathes a sigh that's deep enough for his shoulders to rise and fall with it. "Sometimes... Sometimes I wish we could be kids again. Not having to work 25 hours without sleeping or caring about gaining two kilos."

"Yuya." Yamada says, surprised even though sometimes he feels exactly the same, and he reaches for Takaki's hands, taking them in his.

"I know it's ridiculous and this is all we ever dreamed of, but sometimes... Things like that now. So what if you've gained some. It's not like you're fat and you're beautiful anyway and why does that have to be anyone's business? I know why, I just... Get really tired sometimes." Takaki sighs, squeezing Yamada's hands in his and Yamada wonders if he's ever felt this intimate with Takaki before.

"Thanks for standing up for me." Yamada says honestly, and Takaki looks up, a hint of a smile on his lips. "I was seriously about to burst out crying back there so thanks for saving me that embarrassment."

Takaki frowns at that, then untangles a hand from Yamada's and raises it to stroke his cheek instead. It feels good, and Yamada leans into the touch, the soft caring kind of touch he needs right now. "We don't take good enough care of you, do we?"

"No, you just did." It's Yamada's turn to frown, because that's not even Takaki's job. He's an adult, he should be able to take care of himself. "You shouldn't even have to."

"I want to." Takaki says honestly, hand moving back to sift through Yamada's hair. "We all want to. You heard Hikaru earlier, right? We know you work more than us and we're worried."

Yamada sighs, since he's never thought about it like that before and it makes him feel a bit like a child needing to be tended to. "Sometimes I really do wish we could be kids again."

"Can't we pretend for now?" Takaki asks, and when Yamada meets his eyes to try and figure out what he means, they're hopeful and a little hooded. "At least be sixteen and nineteen again and not care about what we have to do tomorrow?"

Yamada looks at him for a moment, glances at Takaki's lips and at the scenery behind him, considers how beautiful this city really is in the dark, and figures that fuck it, if he can't eat cream anymore, he might as well indulge in this.

"Yeah, we can." He says, then leans up to brush his lips against Takaki's, the kiss immediately reciprocated and Yamada can feel how much Takaki needs this too. It's slow and warm and relaxing to actually kiss someone, and Yamada melts into it enough to just part his lips when Takaki asks for permission, making a small sound when their tongues meet. He can't even remember the last time he kissed someone, especially not just for the sake of doing it, and he really hasn't kissed Takaki since he was sixteen and anxious to try it out. It's better than he remembers it, and he has no idea for how long they're standing there, arms wrapped around each other for warmth and closeness and the wind brushing strands of hair in their faces.

When they finally break apart, Yamada's lips feel tingly and swollen and the stressed tension in his body is replaced with another kind of tension that is much less urgent and much more pleasant.

"That felt good." Yamada says, finding his voice low and raspy, and Takaki smiles in a way that makes him shiver.

"Yeah, it did." Takaki agrees, then leans in to kiss him again, a final lingering kiss and Yamada thinks that this is a lot better than eating cream buns. "You want to come home with me? I'd really like to just cuddle with someone."

Yamada smiles, arms around Takaki's waist tightening because Takaki seems to know exactly what he needs. "Yeah, me too. I'm probably going to fall asleep the second I lie down."

"Good, me too." Takaki grins. "I guess we're not that young after all."

"Oh I am." Yamada protests. "Just come back when I've slept more than four hours and I'll show you."

Takaki chuckles, and lets go of Yamada as he starts heading towards the door again. "I'll hold you to that."

 

~*~

 

 


End file.
